I’m re-evaluating. After all, it’s the 31st of December and this next year is the last year of homeschooling my own children. In May my youngest son will graduate. I get to decide what I’m going to do next.

Thing is, I need to decide before he graduates. I don’t know what conditions will be at that time. I’m nervous. I’m scared of running out of money; I don’t want to fit myself to a business’s schedule. I don’t want to become a lowly employee, disrespected and subject to bosses. I have been the boss of my home for many, many years. I decide the music, the food, the location; I decide the arrangement of furniture, the decor, my clothing, and the aromas. Within reason I decide on my co-workers, but my children are growing up and potentially moving away.

I looked into teaching at more homeschool co-op locations. I checked the library website for volunteer opportunities. I listened to a video discussion of online jobs that pay well, actual legitimate positions as opposed to fly-by-night scams. I checked my home for possibilities: I have an extra room that could be cleared out and used for teaching, or storing merchandise to sell online. I don’t yet have an extra bedroom that could be rented, but there may be one or even two in the future. I have a vehicle that works well; it could carry furniture or I could deliver food. It’s not fancy enough or well-maintained enough to be a taxi, at least not in its current condition.

My education is good; I have an associates degree from fifteen years ago. High school was thirty years ago but I’ve been actively using school skills in the meantime. I could tutor in English, writing, literature. I have the ability to do math at a high school level but not the desire to teach it. I could teach history and science up to a high school level. I can read, study, and recall facts pretty well. I have no desire to become an official student, because of tests, deadlines, and required paper writing. But I love learning new things, literally every day.

I will never be a gym teacher. Sports do not interest me. I like martial arts but have no ability and almost no training in it. Dance is fun but not my strength, and my body has lost some of the limited flexibility it started with.

I can do paperwork; I hate it. Data entry might be interesting for a while; there’s not much demand for it since people are required to enter their own information into forms online. I could help people navigate the forest of regulations, but the very thought of doing so grinds my gears.

Nursing and becoming a doctor do not interest me. Wearing a mask feels restrictive. I know a lot about nutrition but do not trust the powers that be; information is always changing and is subject to advertising. I don’t want to tell people what to eat.

Cleaning houses isn’t my strength. I could do it, if it were not for strong smelling chemicals, bending over and lifting. My own house suffers from benign neglect; dishes and laundry get done, but sweeping waits longer.

What I really want to do, is write, and talk with people. I have an ability with words. I can read expressively. I can talk and I can listen. I have some ability to sense emotions; perhaps therapy or listening on a hotline could work.