Recharge

Being mom is stressful. It’s a lifelong commitment to devote time and energy to children whether or not they want my attention, as well as a commitment to step back and let them try on their own, pick them up after they fall, hug them, and let them go out and do it again. God may have perfect patience, but I definitely do not. I can only do so much before my cup is empty.

So to recharge, I try to get enough sleep; sometimes this is staying up really late listening to child who needs to talk out her challenges, then sleeping in late. Sometimes this is getting up early to take child to an event and then dozing in the car until time to bring child home. Sometimes this is snoring in the recliner while child plays on the computer and listens to videos, because being present means if they get into the bad side of the internet I will know and can do something about it. It’s not a perfect system, but it works pretty well most of the time.

I try to eat healthy foods. Turns out they love canned peas as toddlers; a new pinching skill needs practice. They also love pasta without much on it. I can eat all the chunky sauce and they are happy throwing spaghetti. As they grow I can serve canned fruit straight from the can; they help me shuck corn cobs and adore eating corn on the cob. Basic foods cut and served are good enough, and often better than highly processed foods. On the other hand, can dump soup is a thing; a can of meat, a can of mixed veggies, a can of cream soup or diced tomatoes, heat and serve. They don’t need as much sugar as they think they do, and the society around us throws sugar at them anyway, so gather up the candy from holidays and dole it out a little at a time. No need to make desserts most of the time.

I seek to learn something every day. I keep books around; we used to visit the library religiously every two weeks. Now I’d rather read online or purchase books or listen to audio, because I don’t have to remember to return them. I listen to videos and read educational articles on a wide variety of topics.

I limit advertising. We don’t watch cable TV. We have adblockers on all of our computers. I choose streaming services that have no advertising. When advertisements are unavoidable, I consciously look away, throw away, dodge, get rid of as soon as possible. If we really need something, we all know how to search for it; we can look up reviews to find good quality stuff.

I walk outside. Fresh air is underrated; it really helps, even on frigid days. Sunlight and wind are refreshing, and when they’re oppressive, it’s a relief to finish walking and get back indoors. In both cases, my body and mind have had to work. It’s good.

I stretch. Arm circles, lunges, stair climbing, waving like trees, all help move my body. It prevents stiffness and gets my internal systems moving.

I take time to think. This is a necessary and almost forgotten art: take time to just be. My schedule has no more than one or two trips out of the house per day. On those rare occasions when we have three or more in one day, I try to take the next day to stay home completely. A more open schedule leads to much less stress and much better preparation for those things we choose to do.

I hug people. Cry and laugh and listen and listen some more and ask interested questions and listen thoughtfully. Spend time with people who love you and whom you love.

Now I must go; the sun is shining and I need a walk.