Humility and respect

Soon after our first child was born, my husband rejoined the Army National Guard. He worked hard at it. Over 23 years he progressed from Spec 4 up to E 7 Sergeant First Class. He seriously considered becoming an E 8 Master Sergeant, but it would have meant specialization to the point of not working directly with the rank and file soldiers in his unit. I think it's roughly equivalent to moving into administration instead of teaching classes yourself, another distinction he avoided. He loved working with people, average people, ground level people. He hated administration, though he said he had learned to creditably fake his commander's signature on the never-ending paperwork.

My husband was not classist at all. He appreciated having authority to make changes and he was not afraid of taking responsibility and changing things. He recognized the hierarchy wherever he was, and strove to work within established channels. But he was under no illusion of innate worth from position. He humbly listened and while he gave respect as required, he didn't worship authority. In each place he worked, he let leaders know calmly when he disagreed with their decisions, backing up his statements with information. He actively tried to improve the situation wherever he was.

Sooner or later someone always tried to boot him upstairs, whether they thought he would do a better job up there, or they wanted him out of their hair. A humbler, harder working, more enthusiastic man it would be hard to find. Sometimes it makes me tired to remember just how much it was like holding a dragon by the tail.