Friends of my parents

I want to say my parents had a lot of friends, but I don’t know how to measure their relationships. They attended church activities regularly, often in charge of or helping with arrangements. They socialized at church, mostly. When people we knew had events in their homes, we went, stayed an hour, talked and snacked, and went home. At least, my mother and us children went. My dad went to events… celebrations, graduations, marriages, funerals, especially ones held at the church. I don’t remember him going for fun. I do remember being told to help set up chairs and tables beforehand, and tear down afterwards. He couldn’t leave the church until everything was shipshape, so my sister and I got used to finding ways to help. My parents were almost always cheerful about it, in a matter-of-fact way. My dad could be grumpy but rarely said anything; my mother loved to talk with people and thoroughly enjoyed meeting them, anyone, anytime. She just had lots of work to do maintaining her home, food, garden, children, reading, learning. There wasn’t an expectation that we would ever just goof off. Resting was rest, as in, sleeping or relaxing while doing something that could be done sitting down, like genealogy or snapping beans.

They did not hold events in their home; they did not invite people over to eat other than the missionaries assigned to our ward. On Sunday afternoons they drove a half hour to Burlington to visit my dad’s parents. Otherwise they stayed home, or went to church activities and school activities for their children. My mother enjoyed talking with friends at church, and knew a lot of people in town. My father was quiet almost all the time. He enjoyed his sons and his sons-in-law; he liked to play board games with his children. I don’t know who his friends were, other than us.