A month at home.
My husband worked for Au Bon Pain for a couple years. Then the powers that were, decided to sell to Panera Bread. They wanted really good numbers for the restaurant, so they told him to keep costs down. There’s constant turnover in restaurant work, and as people left he was not allowed to hire replacements. He had to do more and more himself. Finally he went to his doctor and was told to take a month off for his mental health.
That was a relief, and also a challenge. I was at home with four small children, homeschooling without any experience. It was wild and crazy and loud and the dishes never got completely washed and the laundry was always backed up. There were Cheerios all over the floor. It was Christmas time in northern Ohio; everyone was indoors except when freezing in the snow and slush. We invited a new family over for dinner on the night the church members surprised us with gifts. The new family was astonished and happy for us.
My husband was ever so glad to go back to work! After that month at home he changed. He admired me more, and marveled at how much I accomplished, though our house was always cluttered and the children always making noise. He dated me weekly or every other week, as often as we could get a babysitter. He told me I needed time away from children and a meal I didn’t have to make, even though we talked about the children for most of our date time. He gave me a day to go away from home while he took care of the children and the house, about every six months or so, and for our anniversary we always went out of town overnight. He took me to the temple as often as our finances allowed. At the time it was a six hour drive each way to the nearest temple, and often it meant crossing into Canada to the Toronto temple, as it was cheaper to stay there than to stay in a hotel outside Washington, D.C.
He worked long hours, early and late, covering shifts whenever they were shorthanded as well as his regular shifts, so he helped enforce the chore system I set up, where children learned to clean up as soon as they could follow directions, washed dishes as soon as they could reliably get them clean, and washed clothes as soon as they were tall enough to reach the bottom of the clothes washer without falling into it. He did much of the deep cleaning on his days off. God blessed us with seven children, so I spent many many hours nursing, changing cloth diapers, and caring for small children. My husband was a Godsend.
